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2002-04-25 - 7:40 p.m. Today is the fourth anniversary of my Bat Mitzvah. I bet you didn't know that. I bet you didn't care. Maybe barricading myself in my room is a bad idea. I have to pee. I like Seinfeld. That Louis-Dreyfuss chick rocks my world. It's on now, you know. I bet you didn't know that. I bet you didn't care. I want to levitate inside of a giant V like the lady on the Payless commercial who is wearing too much makeup. Oh, yeah. If I were a Roman, I would have walked around around saying "canis est in via" all day. It's just so fun to say. So is "catapultam habeo" and "frunulum panae nolo". Or however you spell it. Oooooooooooooooh, Star Wars is gonna be on tonight at 8:00! Whee! I like Star Wars. I really like Star Wars. Did I mention that I like Star Wars? Meh, I have to pee really badly now. Maybe I'll just unbarricade for a second, then rebarricade. Okay, okay, room unbarricaded. I'm a horrible, weak pig. I had a piece of leftover birthday cake. My father led me into temptation. Mmmm, nothing says "I love werewolves" like a warm Sharpie.
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