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2003-01-28 - 8:15 p.m.

There is a place, somewhere over there, to which all things eventually go. One day you will end up there. You might just be walking down the street one day, kicking children and small dogs from your path, and suddenly you'll find yourself there. You'll look around you, and a single thought will come into your head: "Oh."

Certainly, it doesn't always look the same. Sometimes it's beige, sometimes a pale sandy fawn colour. One time there might be an eggplant there, another time it'll be more like an aubergine. But you'll know when you've arrived, for the wall is adorned with a large, imposing sign that reads, simply, "You are here". And you are. You are. Or rather, you will be, but that doesn't sound as ominous.

The next day you might go shopping or something, or maybe give the cat a bath, I don't know, what am I, your mothership?

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